It’s easy for downsizing to feel negative, especially if it’s a forced process of getting rid of stuff due to a move. Even if it’s proactive (as in the practice of Swedish Death Cleaning) the focus on getting rid of things can maximize the sense of loss. It can feel completely overwhelming when you have a house full of things, and without a fixed timeline, the process can seem indefinite.
However, downsizing can be a great thing to do for your own life, and the lives of others who may inherit your things, so it’s a worthwhile challenge, and there are practices that can help make it not just achievable, but even a positive experience. Here’s what I discuss with my clients, and I hope this helps you in your process!
1) Acknowledge that downsizing is hard and understand why it is for you.
One way to help yourself in the process is to acknowledge the challenges you have with downsizing and give yourself grace while working through it. Here are some of the many reasons downsizing can be difficult:
- Acquiring things has become incredibly easy as companies reduce the friction involved in the purchasing process (think auto subscriptions, one-click purchases), and it’s easy to get things inexpensively (like fast fashion).
- People are wired to be bad at getting rid of things. We are better at adding than subtracting (as captured in the book Subtraction) and we have loss aversion. Getting rid of things is a muscle that can take time to learn how to use if it hasn’t been exercised often.
- Once people have “invested” in items they don’t want to let go of them. There may be feelings of guilt and wastefulness due to the sunk cost fallacy. And if items do have actual value, people aren’t sure what it is and/or how to sell valuables.
- Functional items are useful and people can fall into a trap of holding onto things that might be useful in a hypothetical future.
- Sentimental value makes it hard to get rid of things that represent people or experiences.
- Objects represent identity. They can relate to activities that used to happen or could happen in the future. Letting go of them can feel like a loss of who you were or could be.
- Downsizing can make people confront their mortality.
2) Set positive goals.
Just getting rid of stuff isn’t a positive goal to move towards. Set goals that focus on the present and future. How do you want to live your life now and what are you moving towards? What do you want to make space for? Thinking about it as rightsizing might help too. Here are some benefits of downsizing that could help shape your goals:
- Having fewer things makes it easier to stay organized. I always tell my clients to aim for 75% full for any area because it makes it easier to access items and add items without the system falling apart. This also opens up space for expanding or future interests.
- With a smaller collection of items you can see and appreciate them more. Putting a few pieces of memorabilia into rotation is much more impactful than having more items in boxes.
- It’s great to put items into the hands of people who will enjoy and use them. An item that is gathering dust and neglect in your home may be a great asset to someone else.
3) Set a schedule.
Downsizing is great to do proactively, when you’ve got choices, however it can be really hard to maintain momentum without any real deadlines, so you have to make your own. Here are some ways to set your own deadlines:
- Create a schedule that works for you. You can work a little bit more frequently, or fewer big chunks of time, anything can work, just don’t be too ambitious to start, and anticipate adjusting how you work based on your experience.
- You can create interim deadlines related to real events in your life, like a family member coming to visit who may want stuff, or holidays.
- Get an accountability partner (a friend, family member, and/or professional organizer). This person can check in with you on deadlines, act as a coach, and/or help you work through things. They just need to be empathetic and non-judgmental!
4) Research ahead of time where stuff can go.
Many people get stuck downsizing because they don’t know what to do with what they have, especially if there are items with sentimental value, high cost value, and/or there’s a high volume of things. There are many meaningful ways to help items leave your home. Some suggestions are:
- Talk to family. Find out if they want anything (don’t assume they do!), and if yes, what.
- Know what your area provides with regard to recycling, hazardous waste, special item pickups, etc.
- If you have a lot of things, research junk hauling companies in your area. Many will donate before they recycle or discard. You can also consider doing an estate sale or auction with a company like MaxSold.
- If you want to sell things: 1) Research what those items have sold for, 2) Decide on a cost or volume limit to how much you’ll sell, and 3) Post online via places like NextDoor, Facebook Marketplace, OfferUp, and eBay.
- If you like to donate items, Goodwill or local thrift stores are a great option, or the online neighborhood groups BuyNothing or NextDoor. There are many specialty donation options available if you’d like to support certain causes or want to find a home for everything from bras to shoes to pianos.
5) Outline a process.
One of the hardest parts of downsizing is feeling overwhelmed and not knowing where to start. Here are some recommendations on how to get going:
- Start with easy tasks that have a big impact (frequent use or very visible areas). Don’t start with the garage/basement or whatever space is where random items are stashed - those places tend to be more miscellaneous and have more items that are “deferred decisions” or sentimental so they can take awhile. Also save papers, small items, and sentimental items for last - they are very time consuming, hard to do, and a low bang for the buck.
- Go by zone so you can see progress and contain messiness. Bring like items together as you go to make a better decision about what to keep (for example if you find some tote bags bring tote bags from all over the home to decide on them together).
- Set up before you begin with a trash bag, recycle bag, bag/box for donate/sell, and music if it helps you stay motivated.
- Set a time limit so you can learn what your pacing is like and set realistic expectations for how much gets done.
- When you’re done with an area, reset it so that it matches your current/future lifestyle. Shifting a layout, even if it’s just a few small things, can help you visualize the positive present/future rather than your old life with less stuff.
- Celebrate because this work can be hard! Clap often. Give yourself a treat. Report back to your accountability partner.
6) Define decision-making criteria.
Downsizing can stall when you get stuck on making a decision so it’s helpful to have some guidelines. Here are a few to consider:
- Have an idea of how much you want to downsize. For each category you can decide a percentage to reduce by, or how much space you want to have for these items.
- When starting out just focus on definite yes and no. If there are maybes you can keep them for now, and/or put them in a purgatory to decide later.
- If you get stuck making a decision, put it as a maybe and move on (like an exam, you can go back to it later).
- Have some questions to ask yourself about items, such as:
- Will you use it in the next 6 months or year? Resist keeping items for hypothetical future use, especially if it can be easily replaced if needed.
- Do you have a strong positive emotional attachment? If yes, keep it in a memorabilia box or area where you can appreciate it.
- Can you curate your collection rather than keeping everything? If you have duplicates or a collection consider choosing a subset to keep.
- Am I going to notice or mourn this item once it’s gone?
7) Learn more about downsizing.
There’s a lot that’s been written about downsizing and it can also help to learn more so you feel more equipped. Here are some books that have been recommended to me, but also check out podcasts and articles.
If taken with a positive approach, I believe downsizing can actually be an enjoyable process. It can be a point of reflection on where you’ve been, where you are, and what’s possible. I hope these tips help you embrace the process and good luck on your journey!
It’s easy for downsizing to feel negative, especially if it’s a forced process of getting rid of stuff due to a move. Even if it’s proactive (as in the practice of Swedish Death Cleaning) the focus on getting rid of things can maximize the sense of loss. It can feel completely overwhelming when you have a house full of things, and without a fixed timeline, the process can seem indefinite.
However, downsizing can be a great thing to do for your own life, and the lives of others who may inherit your things, so it’s a worthwhile challenge, and there are practices that can help make it not just achievable, but even a positive experience. Here’s what I discuss with my clients, and I hope this helps you in your process!
1) Acknowledge that downsizing is hard and understand why it is for you.
One way to help yourself in the process is to acknowledge the challenges you have with downsizing and give yourself grace while working through it. Here are some of the many reasons downsizing can be difficult:
- Acquiring things has become incredibly easy as companies reduce the friction involved in the purchasing process (think auto subscriptions, one-click purchases), and it’s easy to get things inexpensively (like fast fashion).
- People are wired to be bad at getting rid of things. We are better at adding than subtracting (as captured in the book Subtraction) and we have loss aversion. Getting rid of things is a muscle that can take time to learn how to use if it hasn’t been exercised often.
- Once people have “invested” in items they don’t want to let go of them. There may be feelings of guilt and wastefulness due to the sunk cost fallacy. And if items do have actual value, people aren’t sure what it is and/or how to sell valuables.
- Functional items are useful and people can fall into a trap of holding onto things that might be useful in a hypothetical future.
- Sentimental value makes it hard to get rid of things that represent people or experiences.
- Objects represent identity. They can relate to activities that used to happen or could happen in the future. Letting go of them can feel like a loss of who you were or could be.
- Downsizing can make people confront their mortality.
2) Set positive goals.
Just getting rid of stuff isn’t a positive goal to move towards. Set goals that focus on the present and future. How do you want to live your life now and what are you moving towards? What do you want to make space for? Thinking about it as rightsizing might help too. Here are some benefits of downsizing that could help shape your goals:
- Having fewer things makes it easier to stay organized. I always tell my clients to aim for 75% full for any area because it makes it easier to access items and add items without the system falling apart. This also opens up space for expanding or future interests.
- With a smaller collection of items you can see and appreciate them more. Putting a few pieces of memorabilia into rotation is much more impactful than having more items in boxes.
- It’s great to put items into the hands of people who will enjoy and use them. An item that is gathering dust and neglect in your home may be a great asset to someone else.
3) Set a schedule.
Downsizing is great to do proactively, when you’ve got choices, however it can be really hard to maintain momentum without any real deadlines, so you have to make your own. Here are some ways to set your own deadlines:
- Create a schedule that works for you. You can work a little bit more frequently, or fewer big chunks of time, anything can work, just don’t be too ambitious to start, and anticipate adjusting how you work based on your experience.
- You can create interim deadlines related to real events in your life, like a family member coming to visit who may want stuff, or holidays.
- Get an accountability partner (a friend, family member, and/or professional organizer). This person can check in with you on deadlines, act as a coach, and/or help you work through things. They just need to be empathetic and non-judgmental!
4) Research ahead of time where stuff can go.
Many people get stuck downsizing because they don’t know what to do with what they have, especially if there are items with sentimental value, high cost value, and/or there’s a high volume of things. There are many meaningful ways to help items leave your home. Some suggestions are:
- Talk to family. Find out if they want anything (don’t assume they do!), and if yes, what.
- Know what your area provides with regard to recycling, hazardous waste, special item pickups, etc.
- If you have a lot of things, research junk hauling companies in your area. Many will donate before they recycle or discard. You can also consider doing an estate sale or auction with a company like MaxSold.
- If you want to sell things: 1) Research what those items have sold for, 2) Decide on a cost or volume limit to how much you’ll sell, and 3) Post online via places like NextDoor, Facebook Marketplace, OfferUp, and eBay.
- If you like to donate items, Goodwill or local thrift stores are a great option, or the online neighborhood groups BuyNothing or NextDoor. There are many specialty donation options available if you’d like to support certain causes or want to find a home for everything from bras to shoes to pianos.
5) Outline a process.
One of the hardest parts of downsizing is feeling overwhelmed and not knowing where to start. Here are some recommendations on how to get going:
- Start with easy tasks that have a big impact (frequent use or very visible areas). Don’t start with the garage/basement or whatever space is where random items are stashed - those places tend to be more miscellaneous and have more items that are “deferred decisions” or sentimental so they can take awhile. Also save papers, small items, and sentimental items for last - they are very time consuming, hard to do, and a low bang for the buck.
- Go by zone so you can see progress and contain messiness. Bring like items together as you go to make a better decision about what to keep (for example if you find some tote bags bring tote bags from all over the home to decide on them together).
- Set up before you begin with a trash bag, recycle bag, bag/box for donate/sell, and music if it helps you stay motivated.
- Set a time limit so you can learn what your pacing is like and set realistic expectations for how much gets done.
- When you’re done with an area, reset it so that it matches your current/future lifestyle. Shifting a layout, even if it’s just a few small things, can help you visualize the positive present/future rather than your old life with less stuff.
- Celebrate because this work can be hard! Clap often. Give yourself a treat. Report back to your accountability partner.
6) Define decision-making criteria.
Downsizing can stall when you get stuck on making a decision so it’s helpful to have some guidelines. Here are a few to consider:
- Have an idea of how much you want to downsize. For each category you can decide a percentage to reduce by, or how much space you want to have for these items.
- When starting out just focus on definite yes and no. If there are maybes you can keep them for now, and/or put them in a purgatory to decide later.
- If you get stuck making a decision, put it as a maybe and move on (like an exam, you can go back to it later).
- Have some questions to ask yourself about items, such as:
- Will you use it in the next 6 months or year? Resist keeping items for hypothetical future use, especially if it can be easily replaced if needed.
- Do you have a strong positive emotional attachment? If yes, keep it in a memorabilia box or area where you can appreciate it.
- Can you curate your collection rather than keeping everything? If you have duplicates or a collection consider choosing a subset to keep.
- Am I going to notice or mourn this item once it’s gone?
7) Learn more about downsizing.
There’s a lot that’s been written about downsizing and it can also help to learn more so you feel more equipped. Here are some books that have been recommended to me, but also check out podcasts and articles.
If taken with a positive approach, I believe downsizing can actually be an enjoyable process. It can be a point of reflection on where you’ve been, where you are, and what’s possible. I hope these tips help you embrace the process and good luck on your journey!
